I Found My Inner Child

And subsequently injured my middle-aged self

Okay, I frequently act childish, but this was especially fun.

It’s possible my inner child was lost. I’ve always had a terrible sense of direction, after all.

I sit drinking shitty hotel coffee at 5am, having hardly slept at all. I remember when staying in a hotel was an exciting treat.

We made a special stop on our trip, which our son will absolutely love, but I forgot about the fact that I cannot sleep in hotels. I sleep so much better in a tent in the wilderness.

I’ve never been to this very popular tourist attraction, and our son is the right age to really enjoy something like this, so we made a special stop at West Edmonton Mall.

We spent the morning doing mazes, playing mini-golf, and getting whiplash in the bumper cars (you know you’re old when…). After lunch we hit the waterpark. That place is fun! Everything is crazy expensive, of course, but this was a once-in-a-lifetime trip. so we sucked it up.

There were long lines for all the waterslides, but they moved quickly. And these aren’t just any waterslides, they’re waterslides on steroids. Rollercoasters on water. These things are amazing.

I started out on the kid-friendly waterslides and gradually worked my way up to the more adventurous ones. I swear I found my inner child. I distinctly remember saying “whee!” on my way down. More than once.

We stayed until closing time, meaning we probably spent five hours at the waterpark.

As we’re about to leave, I realize I spent all my time on the waterslides, and hadn’t yet tried the wave pool.

My 9 year old son is telling us he’s ready to go, and my 39 year-old self is all, “just five more minutes, please!” I run in and dive in the waves. Some people are swimming like me, but most are riding those big yellow tubes and cruising on top of the waves.

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